no apology is a Yahoo Life series where people get a chance to share how they live their best lives – out loud and in colour, without fear or regret – looking back at the past with a smile and embracing the future with enthusiastic anticipation.
Cheryl Burke Step into a new stage of life. The Dancing with the stars Pro, 38 years old, recently She divorced her husband, Matthew Lawrence. Now, she’s learning how to feel comfortable in her own company after “griefing” over the end of her marriage. For now, she “chooses not to date,” she says.
“It’s just me and my French,” she told Yahoo Life. “I’ve been sober now for four years, and that comes with self-reflection. I’m like a sponge and I’m just learning to love myself and really learning to be alone instead of being alone. I think it’s very important for me to have that relationship with myself so that I don’t continue in the same pattern of Men and Relationships.
When it’s time to file dancing moms So far, she says she’s avoiding dating apps in favor of an old-school approach to meeting someone.
“I’m all about matchmakers,” she says. I know the statistics show that they have a high percentage. It’s not just about swiping left to see who looks good and what profession they’re in – it’s deeper than that.”
However, the relationship you are focusing on the most at the moment is the relationship with her. Burke who previously She opened up about her past with sexual assaultHe has a self-care routine that includes meditation and therapy. One of the important things I learned through both processes was the idea that we are not “our thoughts,” but rather, “observers” of our thoughts.
“It’s trying not to identify yourself through outside sources,” she notes. “So your job, your friends, your family, your name…it develops that foundation within you and defines your self-worth without all of that.”
This includes stopping the people-pleasing tendencies you have relied on in the past.
“I was putting everyone else before me and my needs, and realizing I was doing myself a disservice,” she explains. “I think it’s very important to take a breath and be kind to yourself because that’s not easy.”
Burke, from Struggling with an imbalance in the bodyWhat you see in the mirror is not necessarily what everyone sees. As she tries to change the “vocabulary” around her self-criticism, her body is something she thinks about often.
“I think it’s really hard for women to accept who they are today,” she reflects. “Especially if you’re in a field like I’m in the entertainment industry… Comparison is the devil.”
“I hope one day my dysmorphic dysmorphia will go away,” she adds. “But I also have to… give it a blessing, and the same as I get older. It’s as if you have to accept it for what it is and just know that you are working to be better… and I think the more you have it on the inside, the more you see it on the outside.”
When it comes to feeling excited, Burke says, “What makes me feel excited every day is to love myself, is to really give back to me and put me first.”
She also recently talked about never having an orgasm through sexual intercourse — a story that, she says, was “misinterpreted” a bit by the press.
“I’ve had an orgasm before through sexual acts,” she explained. “But when it comes to being molested, when I was a little girl, [there are] Sex acts that I don’t necessarily want to perform on me, because it’s such an exciting thing when it comes to my mental health. I know a few women who’ve been through something similar that also feel the same way, or that you just totally broke up and sex just became a verb, and there’s no sense behind that.”
Now, Burke says she “doesn’t apologize much” about sharing her “life story” — even when some people complain that she’s “over-sharing”.
The reason, she says, is “the amount of comments, emails, and feedback I get from people who say, ‘Thank you’.” I know I’m not alone. “
“That to me… means the world,” she shares. “It removes any shame, even just talking about it, because I hope to lead by example.”
—Video produced by Olivia Schneider.
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